I don’t quit.
I stick with things long after others have given up. My StrengthsFinder assessment says one of my top strengths is Responsibility, which means I take psychological ownership for anything I commit to, and feel emotionally bound to follow it through to completion. I’ve been called “Wonder Woman” (and have the picture to prove it) because people know I will figure out whatever needs to be figured, do whatever needs to be done and finish no matter what it takes. (Yes, that may sound like a not-so-#HumbleBrag, but hang with me … there’s a point here.)
I’ve been excited to read 5 Habits of a Woman Who Doesn’t Quit by Nicki Koziarz for a long time. I first heard Nicki speak on this topic at a retreat a couple of years ago and it was at that retreat where God crystallized the dream for Do A New Thing. So the message is near and dear to my heart.
It’s a book I could read and enjoy without worrying about God stepping on my toes, because, you know … I don’t quit.
Or so I thought until I was confronted with my own Quitzilla.
Nicki describes Quitzilla as that woman who is “furious, fed up and quick to walk away.” That doesn’t sound like my outsides, but when I hit Chapter 6, I found my insides described on the page.
The Quiet Quitter. Yep, that’s me.
It’s this quiet place where she starts to step back and draw lines of division in her heart. She slowly cuts herself out of plans, projects and people. – Nicki Koziarz
My insides quit on projects while my outsides complete all my assigned tasks.
My insides quit on my church while my outsides show up in the pew every Sunday.
My insides quit on healthy eating while my outsides trained for a half-marathon.
My insides quit on relationships while my outsides continue to do what is expected.
My Quitzilla quits caring, quits believing the best, quits feeling committed all while Wonder Woman takes care of everything.
So what’s the big deal? If I’m keeping all of my commitments, what does it matter if I’m not quite feeling it on the inside?
Because quitting on the inside will eventually lead to quitting on the outside, bringing with it bitter feelings and broken relationships.
What’s a girl to do when her Quitzilla has her heart but her Wonder Woman won’t let go?
1. Pray about the assignment
In Habit 1, Nicki challenges us to accept the assignment of refinement. If this is truly our assignment, we need to accept what God wants to do in us through it.
If it isn’t, sometimes it is just time to move on, and there is a right and a wrong way to quit. Complete all your assignments. Leave things in good shape for whoever takes your place. Better yet, find and train your replacement before you quit.
2. Look for the bitter roots
Is there something about this assignment that is just getting under your skin? Maybe a relationship involved that is irritating? Wonder Woman tends to ignore these things and muscle through, rather than call them into the light and deal with them.
3. Recall why you committed in the first place
Remember the excitement, the plans, the fresh ideas you had at the start? At one time, there was a passion for the project, but the daily grind has worn away the shine. Things won’t always be fun, but reconnecting with some of those early motivations can quiet Quitzilla when she starts to rumble.
I am starting something new this week that will challenge me in an area where I have quit on the inside. And to be honest, I am scared to death. I’ve grown comfortable with this line of division in my heart between my insides and my outsides. I have a feeling it is about to be shaken up.
But I want to be a woman who doesn’t quit. On the inside or the outside. Wonder Woman may win out over Quitzilla, but God’s Woman beats them both.
Is God calling you to make your insides match your outsides? Share about your own Quitzilla vs. Wonder Woman battle and I’ll give away a copy of 5 Habits of a Woman Who Doesn’t Quit to someone who comments this week!